Have you ever had a workplace that was completely gossip free? Of course not. Gossip seems to be an unavoidable product of socially interconnected people talking amongst themselves. In the broadest of terms, gossip is defined as anything said about a person when they aren’t around. The most infamous (and, unfortunately, common) form of gossip is malicious. This isn’t always the case though; sometimes gossip can be a positive force. It is not always easy to know just how to respond to gossip.
The number one rule of the grapevine is to question everything. There may be a kernel of truth to most gossip, but things can easily spin out of control and become mangled. It’s a good idea to confirm that what you’ve heard is true before you pass it on. This precaution will help keep your reputation in good regards. Remember, though, that gossip tends to trickle around and alter from one telling to the next. This distorting effect can make gossip difficult to rely on.
There are times when you may want to actively engage gossip- to spread the word about your success on a recent project, for example. Although gossip can be a fast communication method, you should always (even with positive gossip) proceed with caution. You never know what details might be added or removed. Refrain from spreading the latest tidbit if you have any doubts over it.
If you’re office is suffering under the rule of a gossip queen (or king), the best solution is to simply confront this person. Don’t be violent or mean, rather provide them with an ear, ironically, to which they can say what’s actually bothering them. The majority of gossip is about getting attention and, often, there’s a deeper issue at the heart of things. Ask your resident gossip what’s really going on and, hopefully, you’ll get an honest response. Either way, it’s worth mentioning to them the stress their antics are putting on you and the office. If conditions don’t improve, consider telling someone higher up. Be aware though that this news isn’t likely to travel through the grapevine too well. Make sure, then, that if you choose to rat out the gossip, you have the correct source and the rumors are truly defamatory.
Likewise, if you’re planning to take a cue from Machiavelli and build your own gossip throne in order to get ahead, remember that tracking the source of everything in a smaller environment (like an office) can be pretty easy. If found out, not only will your coworkers feel betrayed and disdainful, there could be serious legal repercussions. Defamation lawsuits may be presented to anyone who diffuses lies about a person verbally, transcriptually, or online.
With a little effort, you can also avoid the entire circus altogether. To minimize the amount of gossip you’re exposed to, try listening to music at your desk (at a non-disruptive volume low enough for you to still hear the phone ring). You might also want to try stopping the few rumors you do hear. If someone says something out-of-line about a coworker, openly question it and express concern. Remember that there is a distinction between all the negative gossip and the general social realm of the office; avoiding the former shouldn’t mean excluding yourself from the latter.
By: Erin Kennedy
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Filed under Business by on Jun 30th, 2010. 
There’s an office gossip in every company. The only employee who thinks gardening means tending the office grapevine. The person who knows so much you’d swear s/he is bugging your office, and filling in the blanks with National Inquirer headlines.
Unquestionably, office gossip can be a thorn in management’s side. Chronic gossip mongers can undermine morale, weaken authority, and create unnecessary stress and tension. If an employee is spreading malicious or consistently false rumors, his or her behavior needs to be dealt with just like any other company problem. However, don’t think sitting an employee down and reading him or her the “riot act” will put an end to the office grapevine.
Let’s face it, people are going to talk. According to Video Arts, seventy-five percent of employees first hear about critical job-related matters through the office grapevine. As counter-intuitive as it sounds, silence isn’t always golden when it comes to office rumors. The grapevine can be a valuable way to learn about your employee. Even when the content is false, as our lead-in quote points out, they often reflect an employee’s fears and concerns. Rather than putting your energy into squelching office rumors, your time might be better spent steering the flow of information in your favor. Here are four strategies that will help:
1. Listen to what is said without losing your temper. Don’t go on a witch-hunt for the source of the information; instead, correct false rumors as quickly as possible.
2. Provide as much accurate information into the office as is feasible. Use informal (spontaneous meetings, lunches) as well as formal (memos, bulletin boards) means of communication, but communicate critical information in person if at all possible.
3. Be accessible. Let employees know they have a place to go with concerns and questions, so they won’t have to turn to the company grapevine for information.
4. If you have a chronic gossiper, you need to confront him or her directly; let him or her know the rumors have to stop or s/he will be disciplined. Give the employee positive, constructive alternatives to choose instead of the gossip. After all, people who notice negatives can often help others identify what needs fixing so that they or their operations can be stronger. Show him/her a reasonable, professional method for approaching the person who has the “observed weakness.”
British author Paul Scott said, “Ah well, the truth is always one thing, but it’s the other thing, the gossip, that counts. It shows where people’s heart lies.” If gossip is widespread and rampant, chances are your employees either don’t know enough about what’s going on — or they’re afraid to speak up about it. So, while you don’t have control over what people say, you have more control than you think over how tempted they are to say it.
By: Joni E. Johnston
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Filed under Business by on Jun 30th, 2010.
Dealing with drama at the office is one of the worst parts of being an executive. It has the potential to **** the life out of you, and to kill your motivation, and for many of my clients, it leaves them wondering: “Why did I choose this career?” The best example of this is one my clients – we will call him John.
John is the CEO of a manufacturing company. He hates drama. You can literally see his skin crawl when he talks about it. His face scrunches up. His shoulders tighten and he winces when he talks about the latest drama of the day. “I just don’t get it. What is everyone’s problem? Why can’t they just do their work? It’s like dealing with children.” Then his body crumbles, and he looks defeated. Exhausted. Helpless. Weighed down.
We can all relate to John. We have all experience political situations that we prefer to forget. Those times when we are caught in a pinnacle of workplace drama – one person is upset, gossip in the organization is rampant, and we feel like a ping pong ball as we bounce around trying to make sense of the issue. So, what is an executive to do? If you are caught in drama, how do you get out of this dark hole?
First off, let’s talk about what not to do. John illustrates this well. Every time John experiences drama, he avoids it. He literally shuts down. His face goes blank. He starts to squirm, and he typically nods in a placating way. Not surprisingly, the placating nod does the most harm. When he nods, people feel understood, but when John he takes no action, they get mad. End result? They attack John. They whisper in the lunch room: “What’s his problem? He doesn’t do anything!” Some people get angry. The irony is that now people have a new issue to bond around – John’s deadbeat behaviour. It is not surprising that John has 45% turnover in his company. Not good.
So, what was John doing wrong? Well, a couple of things. For starters, he distanced himself from the drama to the point that he escalated the problem. By distancing himself, John became part of the drama problem because nothing got dealt with in a constructive way.
One of the basic principles of dealing with drama at work is to recognize your emotional patterns when you encounter drama and to recognize how your typical reaction contributes to the problem. Does it escalate it? Enable others? Or diffuse it? If John was able to self-manage his reactions better, he could have taken a different tactic when employees came to him about issues. He could have expressed confidence in their ability to handle the situation constructively, facilitated the development of a behavioural code of conduct, or brought in a skilled third party to help them. Instead, he was so busy managing his own anxiety, nothing got done.
Second, he created a “drama triangle” – a seductive high energy interaction which includes blaming, defensive behaviour, and rescuing. Drama triangles are recognizably consistent no matter what the details of the situation and they include the following roles:
The Persecutor: “This company is such a hole.” “I can’t believe the quality of management.” “It is all John’s fault.” “That VP, Sales is a real idiot.” All the energy goes into finding someone or something to blame for all the company’s problems. Blaming someone else makes people feel better and, of course, it means other people have to change, not you.
The Victim: “I tried my best.” “I couldn’t get through.” “They did this to me.” This is the victim in the drama. They use a helpless tone, and don’t take personal responsibility. They may look for someone to rescue them, or to blame, in order to get rid of their negative feelings.
The Rescuer: Rescuers need a victim to feel good. They are “do-gooders” without boundaries. “Let me fix this. Let me take this on.” “I can save the day.” “Let me rescue this poor person who was hard done by.” Rescuers may try to help people without being asked, or they take a twisted pleasure in getting their nose into other people’s drama.
Most people learn the power of being a persecutor, victim, or rescuer as children and they repeat this behaviour in their career without being aware of it. As an executive, if you engage in this behaviour or react to it, you will escalate the drama and there will be a price to pay – people won’t want to work for you, you will feel drained at work, and you will create a negative culture.
To break the cycle, you need to set the tone of personal accountability, respect, choice, and principled behaviour in your organization and work culture. Here are some specific tactics:
- Watch out for drama triangles and start to pay attention to who is playing the role of persecutor, victim, and rescuer. Be mindful of which role you tend to play.
-Consider the payoff in your organization for taking on a specific role. Are people “bonding” with each other when they have someone else to blame? Are they avoiding dealing with the complexity of issues by blaming one person? Do the “victims” get pity? Do people feel sorry for them, or stay clear, thereby giving them power? Are you creating dependence in your organization by rescuing people? Self-righteousness?
- Explore what is being avoided by participating in the drama. Are there some deeper issues in the organization that need to be addressed? If so, what are they?
- Notice your reactions to drama. What are you doing? Not doing? What are you taking responsibility for? Have you agreed to do more than you want to?
- When you get triggered by a drama, focus on grounding yourself. Do not deal with the drama until you can get involved without escalating your own emotional reaction.
- Facilitate a healthy outcome by focusing on principles – respect, honesty, and making agreements that work. Recognize that the more intense the drama, the harder it will be to get people to come up with a healthy outcome.
-If you are too close to the issue at hand, get a facilitator or executive coach to facilitate healthy dialogue.
By: Natalie Michael
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Filed under Business by on Jun 30th, 2010.
Did you know that the most successful businesses often have great workplace communication? This makes up the foundation of any business that runs efficiently and is profitable. With great communication, employees do not get sidetracked by drama or harmful gossip. Instead, with honest communication you will find that employees work together to solve problems and enjoy one another’s company.
Workplaces that have open communication between all people do not just randomly stumble upon this great attribute. It takes hard work to achieve a culture of communication and transparency in any business. If your workplace could use a boost in its workplace communication, then there are a few steps you can take to improve this important part of your business.
Sometimes businesses work best when a subtle approach is taken to things like communication. Instead of hosting an intense meeting about workplace communication, try hosting a laid back social event. It may seem counter-intuitive to approach workplace communication with a casual level of attention, but this can be one of the best ways to make your point to your employees. Employees do not usually benefit when a boss lectures them or yells at them, especially in areas like workplace communication.
Instead, try hosting a social hour at your own home for employees. This can be the only subtle cue you need to use to show employees that you care about creating a good social environment in the business place. A social hour only has to last for a couple of hours and it is a good time for employees to relax and be honest about how they feel about the business. Lighting a fire pit can add to the comfortable ambience of the social hour. A fire pit has an inviting warmth that will make every employee feel welcome to the event, regardless of any circulating gossip of rumors going around the office. Hosting a social hour can almost create the fresh start your business may need in its workplace communication department.
If you want your business to better serve customers, then having great workplace communication is a must. You simply must care about this part of your business, in order to have a professional environment that is honest and filled with people always willing to work their hardest. Hosting a social hour at your home is a great way to make peace with your employees and get them to bond with one another.
By: Geoffrey Moore
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Firepits
Read more on Creating Great Workplace Communication With Fire Pits…
Filed under Business by on Jun 28th, 2010.
Those who are called experts share some of their revelations about gossip in the workplace in the next four paragraphs and after that follows the judgment of the spiritual master. A professor of communication says “lets foster an ethical environment that encourages positive forms of gossip not how to eliminate it.” When employees share humorous gossip with institutional insights while relaying stories of mischief and poking fun at each other, it can help employees and new hires learn a lot about their organization and its co-workers in a useful way. The professor is saying not whether to gossip, but how to ethically and skillfully do so avoiding the label of being a “gossiper” which can more likely stick to women than to men.
They say men and women gossip equally and some research says it as more nuanced and can sometimes be useful and not something typically negative but an informal conduit for receiving judicious tidbits of information that can change opinions of co-workers and their jobs. There are several types of gossip. One with positive views of the workplace and the people in it and one that’s negative. The negative second type of behavioral gossip, the experts say, usually obstructs the effectiveness of the association and hurts the reputations of its workers, such as when some women talk about the juicy romances of co-workers or who is sleeping with who, her wardrobe and the height of her heels and so on.
Frequent gossipers showed to be more powerful and have dominant, masculine and aggressive behavior and less ********** or soft-spoken qualities. So for the woman who gossip they may seem to hold more power in the place of work. They are also shown as being not well-liked and emotionally distant. Men may gossip about someone’s raise and how much money they make, with more emphasis on personal skills and competition, while focusing on co-workers who have more privileges than themselves. Gossip, the experts say, can be positive or negative depending on the motive of the person gossiping, the context and the probable outcome.
In contrast, a spiritual master from India says there is no such thing as positive gossip. These opinions and others were presented about gossip and these are the answers from the teachings of a great spiritual master from India. The master says, “even among well-meaning associates or co-workers gossip can not have a favorable result for the person being talked about; it makes the person feel ashamed, angered, depressed and strengthens his obstinate behavior. ” The master was very emphatic when he said “When anyone confidentially approached me with any so-called disgraceful or shocking discovery, I made it very clear if it cannot be repeated to everyone, I am not interested in hearing it.” If anyone knows a secret about someone or has a grievance about another, he should keep silent or confront the person directly instead of maligning the suspected wrongdoer for the joy of gossip or be driven by an uncontrollable obsession of impulsive talkativeness.
Informers and self-appointed critics have no excuse or right to expose publicly the faults of others by malicious taunting, exposure or gossip as to do so is a sin against God. Remember it is God who dwells in the bodily temple of the righteous and the error-stricken. The affection for gossiping is the affection for meanness to harm the souls of others. Criticizing and gossiping about the ethical weaknesses of co-workers is a wicked spiritual crime. When the moral errors of anyone is unduly exposed they become shameless and desperate and make no effort to be better and flaunts a devil-may-care- manner. However in a some cases, just the fear of publicity and exposure will keep co-workers good. Once publicized even a slight weakness in a co-worker tends to increase and discredit proportionately to the notoriety given to it. Mundane minds are indeed morbid and especially thrive on distorting the facts, exaggerating the words of co-workers out of context without consideration of relevant circumstances. Negative rumors are a psychological defect to most people which causes them to repeat the errors of others without giving the accused co-workers the opportunity to refute the accusations.
Every time you gossip and criticize anyone you are automatically in tune with that person and you are pulling out the bad karma from him or her and are taking to yourself the bad qualities of that person. To pour the salt of acerbic gossip into the open character wounds of others is purposeless. We must instead administer the healing salve of appropriate support and sympathetic advice to the error-stricken. Those who gossip cannot remedy moral errors with gossip, persecution, taboos and commands.
Did you know that gossiping seems to act similar to an energy drink for people who crave this type of titillation. Those same gossipers should gratify their lust by shouting openly in public all their secret sins they committed themselves. Such disclosure would be unbearable to them even for a minute. Anyone who cannot stand up to such scrutiny themselves should not take pleasure in any way exposing their co-workers. It is not the way of the wise to expose the moral flaws of anyone by bringing them senseless embarrassment.
Many overly liberal newspapers are delving in unscrupulous sensationalism with an uncharitable agenda and are not becoming the healers of immorality, but instead they are becoming scandalmongers. Publications and journalists who love to spice up reporting and pickle gossip to put up their own agenda or sell more newspapers are committing a spiritual crime by catering to the degraded taste of readers who are gossip lovers. To call forth God’s judgment is to gloat over the faults of one’s fellow beings and by critiquing them in a spirit of intolerance. Pointing out the mental dirt in others is a metaphysical and psychological error, instead one should clean out the dirt in the mansion of one’s own mind. Those who are so eager to reform the behavior in others must learn to live thoughtfully before precisely discerning how to place understanding in the lives of anyone prone to error.
Critical people themselves cannot stand criticism as they lack humility. Judges who self-elect themselves critics of others quite effortlessly forget to analyze their own internal failings. Thinking that they are always right they are amplifying the mistakes of others to diminish the enormity of their own faults. Hypocrisy and insincerity taint the character of anyone who is not interested in overcoming his weak points, yet bears aversion for such limitations. If he is thrilled in ripping apart people who suffer from the same type of character flaws he has, he is hiding his own defects behind the scorn of gossip and criticism and is a coward and a ******. The irony is that unprincipled corrupt people who enjoy chastising others about their personality flaws typically posses the identical flaws themselves. The same things that irritate people most in others is most often located festering inside themselves. Unable to honestly look at themselves, such persons suffer feelings of overwhelming gilt and find pleasure in scathing others to vent their frustration and find pleasure in scathing others snidely hiding from their own reprehensibility and themselves.
Some people that are quick-tempered and they themselves cannot tolerate anger in anyone, and the greedy, are unable to put up with greed in others. An established immoralist condemning an immoral person or a liar rebuking a liar has the same effect like a gunshot on a bullet-proof vest.
Anyone who assumes that he can make right the expressions of ignorance in other people should excise with equivalent zeal every bit of ignorance from inside himself. After one has obtained his own wisdom he will then be well suited to eliminate ignorance from the minds of those he desires to help. It is spiritually profitless acquiring the habit of analyzing people while he who criticizes makes of himself unlikable company.
The opinions of those who are not at all qualified to assess critically, particularly those who condemn and carp just to invent discord for the wicked pleasure should be totally ignored. There are two distinct ways to neutralize unworthy critics, one is to be lovingly indifferent or abjectly uninterested in them.
It is God’s Sole Impartiality in judging with absolute fairness with no base passions of what is right and in His compassion, God never openly criticizes anyone—He silently criticizes through one’s own conscience which is louder then words and more piercing than all lectures from human crusaders. Standing the barbs of criticism is a mark of spiritual strength and being humble whether they are just or unjust. Criticism that is justified with a continuous effort to improve one’s behavior and way of thinking, add to one’s self the characteristics of a saint.
If you suffer from talkativeness or are a gossiper bite your tongue and heed these words. Small minds talk about people all the time, average minds talk about events, great minds talk about ideas, and the wise man doesn’t talk. The wise man learns and does not talk because he knows he will not be understood. The wise man becomes quiet and silent while becoming acutely aware of all the motions of life and he never complains. He realizes that all things in life sub serve a divine purpose. When you stop gossiping, complaining and criticizing wisdom begins to percolate into your being and you begin to understand everything.
By: Gary Zalben
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Read more on Gossip in the Workplace – The Expert’s Opinion Versus the Spiritual Master…
Filed under Business by on Jun 28th, 2010.
Gossip in the workplace can be the most depressing and hostile work environments to deal with. So how do you hang up the wagging tongues?
Face it: we live on the same planet. There’s a blackhole in nearly everyone’s heart that wants to **** the motivation, the pep-in-your-step, the life right out of you. Since you know gossip in the workplace happens, what are people saying about you? You might not care if it’s all bad press, and full of bologna–but rather than apathy, become a “gossip Judo Master” and use it for your strength!
Remember Bonnie Raitt’s song, Something to Talk About? Using that same song, with the same idea–giving “them” something to talk about, but taking a whole different direction–is what I’m suggesting. Since it’s a given that tongues will wag quicker than a dog’s on a road trip, then give them something to talk about.
Remember the blue fish in Disney’s Finding Nemo, Dory? She was played by Ellen Degeneres, who had a classic line, “Just keep swimming, just keep swimming…” That’s the first part of this new-you mindset. You know it’s a national pastime to gossip. Gossip in the workplace especially is an industry at this point, but you must swim against the negative current. I work in a family business by day that’s centered around customer service. Without customer service, I wouldn’t have had 3 or more square meals a day for the past 2.5 years.
I personally love giving and receiving great customer service. I also find that I’m a rare breed. Many people I work around (the vendors, not the family members) have this sense of “Us vs. Them”–with “Them” being our customers! Instead of getting involved with the gossip, I’ve been spending time re-inventing myself. I don’t want to swim downstream with these fish. It’s murky down there.
I have a better idea: I’m working on being the most optimistic, customer-oriented, positive person in the “office,” and I’m sure that tongues are wagging. This time around, they don’t have the ammo to complain about my performance. I swim with the Salmon: upstream. The weird thing is, now I’m greeted with a much better reception at work now that I don’t join in the great black hole of gossip and negative attitudes gone wild. It’s funny how easier it seems to get along with everyone when you know the problem just isn’t you…
Whatever negativity you see, whatever brings you down at work or home–don’t participate. Give ‘em something to talk about, and let it be how you’re the one bright-red apple in a barrel full of Granny Smiths. When it comes to beating gossip in the workplace, give them something to talk about.
By: James M Hussey
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Read more on Gossip in the Workplace? Why Gossip May Be the Best Thing For You…
Filed under Business by on Jun 16th, 2010.
Office gossip has many forms, mostly bad, but it is management that sets the tone for any resulting good or evil. At its worst, office gossip is slanderous with appropriate penalties from termination to being sued for civil damages. Certainly the spreading of untruths is harmful to individuals and the work place culture. Office gossip in any form is a reflection of the manner in which management does or does not communicate with and/or support employees.
Workers look for control over their work output, recognition when deserved and security for their being and performance. Gossip in the workplace that is untrue undermines employee control, recognition and security. Most businesses have created written policies that address office gossip. However many businesses simply have policies on office gossip without an understanding how communication and processes either prevent or encourage office gossip.
What if the gossip is true? What if the president is having an affair with one of the sales people? What if the director indeed was arrested for drunken driving? What if the CEO tolerates senior management holing up in their offices with their cronies both tapping and feeding the gossip/rumor mill to protect their turf and/or smear rivals?
When a company culture is reticent to communications, is insensitive to processes that encourage performance output, employee recognition or job security, or tolerates bad character behavior, office gossip develops as employees feel left out of the organization, resent their management and lack confidence that the organization can compete for their long term employment security.
Most of the recent articles on office gossip target the problem as being the employee and in a few cases this may be true. However office gossip is a business cultural phenomenon and therefore the responsibility of management to prevent…not by hands off written policies but by accountable management behaviors that employees understand, respect and emulate. Key behaviors should be:
Management
-Communicate regularly with a consistent positive message. Industry trends, organizational changes and why done, new products, promotions, retirements. Newsletters and emails are just a start. Quarterly meetings by group/team with senior level managers sharing brief overviews allowing Q&A from employees. If reasonable questions surface, commit to timely responses and make sure answered. If information to be shared is less than positive, be direct and honest without a deceiving spin.
-Actions speak louder than words. Management must be visible, accessible and approachable. Too many managers hide in their offices, avoid employees and are purposely evasive when asked reasonable questions. Insecurity and fear in managers is unfortunately common, a reflection of their bosses hiring cronies without performance accountability and reluctance to make necessary management changes. If management wants what best for the organization than for themselves, they must behave accordingly. Daily interaction with employees is a must, saying hello, asking how a project is going and listening sincerely. Survey after survey reflect a majority of managers feel they do the right things but the majority of employees say otherwise.
-Carrots work better than sticks. Managers often reluctant to acknowledge good performance for fear of not getting credit or spoiling employees. Employees consistently tell surveys they hear nine negatives to any one positive from their managers. Praise builds teams and esteem, criticism divides and tears down.
-Stop internal competitions as only divide departments, employees and distract from a needed focus on core competencies and customer needs. Performance measures and rewards should be based on what value delivered to clients, not the trickle down politics of management.
Employees
-Take personal accountability for your performance. Employment is a privilege not an entitlement. Your company must be competitive in value and price which means constant changes including work done and employees required. Add value and your employment is secure… just float along and your job will be vulnerable. Gossiping to deflect attention from you to those offending or not respected often backfires on the gossiper.
-Office gossip is often juicy, fun and sometimes insightful…however it is better to focus on listening skills and speak only when can add value to organization. Either you have confidence and respect for your management or you leave… sticking around to gossip is a waste of your time now and potential elsewhere.
-Avoid labeling fellow employees. Prejudice, bias, hard feelings, jealousies and the like bring no value to the organization and only reflects poorly on offending employees…as well as being potentially libelous. Interesting to see someone label an employee as a “backstabber” but then what does that make them? As the old saying goes, be careful when you point a finger as then there are three more pointing back at you.
The presence of office gossip should be seen by management as a reflection of their performance and organizational effectiveness. The more prevalent gossip, no doubt the more human resource issues will surface and work performance sink. The problem should be addressed with more emphasis on clear, consistent communications and sincere management involvement with employees. Stated policies against office gossip with strong penalties only increase employee distrust and diminishes any respect as management appears insensitive to the needs of employee communications, understanding, recognition and mutual respect and security…encouraging, much less diminishing the gossip.
Change will be a constant in the workplace reflecting the marketplace and competition. Companies that embrace employees as sources of fresh ideas for products, services, enhancements, productivity, are reaping the rewards of change. Management insecurity and fears are a reflection of the leadership of owners, board and senior officers who fear change. Old economy command and control organizations are breading grounds for office gossip. New economy entrepreneurial organizations embrace change, moving so quickly, with incentised participants to a common cause, that there is simply no time for office gossip, just great performance numbers, job security and recognition from many quarters.
Management must accept accountability of their actions/inactions that create a culture where gossip can either thrive or diminish. Employees must accept responsibility for their livelihoods and deliver their best value where at, or change to an employer more appreciative of their deliverables.
By: Harry Gorden
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Read more on Office Gossip – Management Creates or Prevents…
Filed under Business by on Jun 16th, 2010.
Gossip is Good
Gossip is good? There’s a startling thought!
In offices, schools, communities, and families everywhere, we insist that gossip is bad: don’t listen to it, don’t pass it on, and don’t admit to being curious about who’s saying what.
I’m taking a stand here to say that gossip is good. I’m not even going to qualify that with a disclaimer. Nor am I going to dress it up in party clothes by pretending that rumors are different from gossip (they’re not). Instead, here are four reasons why gossip is good.
Learn who trusts you — and whom you can trust People who come to you with rumors and gossip will often request confidentiality — and of course you’ll honor that. And you’ll quickly learn who’s a habitual gossip and who isn’t. If people who don’t have a reputation for gossip and rumor-mongering are talking to you, that’s great. It means you’re reliable, they trust you to care for their reputations, and your opinion matters to them. In learning the gossip styles of your co-workers, you’ll also learn whether they are trustworthy in turn. The things they tell you, the words they choose, and their reasons for talking will give you insight into their values and motivations. Find out what’s worrying people The rumors that surface in a company are key indicators of what’s bothering the employees. If you’re hooked into the rumor mill and gossip grapevine, you’ll learn what people are worrying about. Then you can respond, with your actions and words, to control rumors and help people feel more secure, appreciated, and valued. Discover people’s perceptions What are the company’s chances for success, what project or department is hot and, yes, who got drunk at happy hour? The “wisdom of crowds” says that groups of people are more accurate than you might think at predicting outcomes. When the group is just five or even ten folks in your grapevine, that may or may not be true. However, if even some of those five or ten people are on the same team and their casual comments indicate a real winner of a project, it could be time to buy stock in the company. On the other hand, if they’re unanimous that the project is behind schedule and in trouble, you know to clear your team’s calendar to prepare for whatever assistance you may be called on to provide. Know who the “opinion-setters” are I’ve put “opinion-setters” in quotes because these are the people who spread the bad stories. Sadly, every office has its backstabbers, and these are the star players of the group. You can count yourself fortunate indeed if these people like you, because you surely don’t want to be on the wrong end of their opinions. At the same time, you even more emphatically do not want to be associated with them; their reputation will rub off on you, probably sooner than later. These people are often surprisingly influential. They dress their negativity up in business attire by claiming (and often believing) that they are being responsible corporate citizens. If senior management is out of touch, they may believe what they hear from the opinion-setter. And there’s nothing the opinion-setter likes better than feeling important, so they love the idea that they’ve got the ear of someone in the corner office. Therefore, as much as you may feel squeamish about this, you need to know what they’re saying. Eventually, it will be something about you, your department, or one of your staff. And when it is, you not only want to know about it, you need to know so you can be ready to respond.
It’s all about what you can learn
Just because it’s gossip doesn’t mean it’s not valuable information. When you know what people are muttering to each other around the department’s printer, whispering about in their cubicles, and discussing over a happy-hour beer, then you know where your attention should be focused. Whether you use the knowledge to know when and how to jump on an opportunity, to clue a co-worker in to be more careful about getting to work on time, or to pick the right words in a meeting to help people feel valued and secure, it’s all good stuff.
It’s NOT about what others learn from you
You’ve no doubt noticed that these four reasons all involve listening, not talking. Enough said.
What are they saying in your office? How does your knowledge help you understand what’s happening around you?
“Gossip is the art of saying nothing in a way that leaves practically nothing unsaid.” Walter Winchell, American newspaper and radio commentator who invented the gossip column at the New York Evening Graphic; 1897-1972
By: Grace Judson
About the Author:
Marketing Strategy
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Tags: Casual Comments, Happy Hour, Hot, Predicting Outcomes, Reputation.
Filed under Business by admin on Jun 16th, 2010.